The Sacred Art of Letting Go

The Sacred Art of Letting Go Hello Fellow Travelers, Letting go is one of the most difficult aspects of change. Letting go, as in "dropping the ball, saying goodbye, moving on" can bring on a sense of failure. Letting go when seen as a key ingredient to healing and lasting change can bring a sense of freedom. It can be a release, a freedom and bring in a much needed new perspective. Letting go is still difficult. It is the energy that is behind, in and around change. Something must be let go of, in order for a change to occur. Take time to look, with awareness at what you are needing to let go of at this time in your life. Is it a role, a belief, an idea, a home, a person, a place? Letting go usually calls us to release something that is no longer ours anyways. Is this something still yours? Is it yours to care for, nurture, grow, believe in, stand up for or otherwise claim? It is always the pain associated with loss that keeps us from letting go of something that is no longer ours. It is the fear associated with the unknown that keeps us tightly grasping onto something that is no longer there. And what is on the other side of letting go is usually what we have been asking for or waiting for... Space. Space is on the other side of letting go. Space to fill and do with what is appropriate for us now. Space to cultivate our dreams, our sense of self, our presence. This week was a big letting go week for me. In an earlier post, I spoke of the power of love and told the story of my son, born with a congenital heart defect. When he was a child, I was in charge of his life, his heart and his health. I was the one who took the responsibility for his life. I fed him droppers of potent medicine every six hours to keep his little heart from beating too fast, I learned how to use a stethoscope, do infant CPR, comforted him through countless blood draws, invasive life saving procedures, holter monitors, new drugs, no drugs, asthma. This was our life and I kept it as "normal" as possible and raised four other children. I fell into a rhythm and knew my role as Mother. His heart was my heart, his life in my hands. I was not a hovering mother, for I did not want him to feel deprived in any way. I however hovered internally -between trust and fear. Always hovering. Never resting. This week I let go and went over the edge and into trust. My son is now 25 years old. A quarter of a century worth of living and thriving. It was time. For the first time in his life, I did not go with him to his twice yearly check-up to see his cardiologist. These appointments are big darn deals. His progress is noted, and he undergoes various testing. He is now seeing a new specialist. An adult congenital heart specialist. This field was non existent until a few years ago. These children did not grow up to be healthy adults. In fact we were told he might not make it past ten years old. The future is never, ever certain. I, however, held a place of certainty that I would care for him with my whole being and he would get all the right care and his future would be positive. Always. Yet, his heart is not my heart. He is a grown man. I knew that to hold onto this responsibility would drag me backwards. I knew that there is no physical, emotional, mental or spiritual way to hold onto something that is no longer mine. Holding onto the responsibility to care for my son's heart was robbing him of his own choice. I was holding hostage the responsibility for his health. It was hanging out somewhere between me and my son. It was no longer possible for me to be responsible for something that was no longer mine and it was not possible for him to be responsible if I was still holding it. So I let go. Letting go for me at this time looked like staying home while my son and his girlfriend drove off to Denver (in their first brand new and safe car) and faced the appointment together. It was still difficult. I wanted to say "never mind" so many times in the days preceding. Even though I set it up by talking to my son, telling him my reasons. I felt a surge of intense emotions as I let go. Guilt, fear, panic, peace, freedom, more guilt. Letting go of something this big was, for me an important milestone. Also it is an ending, a closure, a putting to rest the past. It is a letting go and a change. Ultimately letting go leads to a great freedom. A burst of joy, space! I let go of a role that I had outgrown and a way of being with my son that was no longer serving either of us. Letting go is just that. Releasing a person, a place, the past, a belief that no longer holds validity. The space that is left is wide open. This space can be left open or filled. You may fill it with whatsoever your heart desires. The space around me is free. My son has his heart, I have my freedom from holding hostage the responsibility for his health. He now can become the man who takes care of himself. In all ways. There is space for that. There is space for our relationship to change too. There is always room for me to be his mom, at his side when needed and watching from afar when needed. There is a lot of space to enjoy the companionship of our relating as adults. Letting go is freedom. It delivers us into change. Sometimes kicking and screaming, but always with great relief, when we realize we were holding onto something that was blocking us from something better. Life is a journey, change is a given. Letting go is a choice. Choosing to let go when it is time, opens up your life to space, the space that is the depth and breadth of your heart and soul. Blessings, Mary To receive these updates and inspirational messages, be sure you are signed up: Sign up here: If you want to read previous messages they are here www.sacredlyinspiredliving.blogspot.com Pass this message on to family, friends and colleagues! Share the Inspiration!